Ho intenzione di avere un buon tempo

I mentioned a couple of posts ago that I might have some exciting news about my plans for summer...well, they have been confirmed now so I can actually talk about them without worrying about jinxing it! Basically, I have been offered a place to go and teach English to Italian kids in summer camps all over Italy. How epic is that? You get to live with actual Italian families and they cover everything for you, food, living costs, travel etc whilst you're in Italy. Plus you get weekends off for sightseeing AND you get paid for doing it. I applied for it at the beginning of April and the application process has been really hard; I had to come up with some extensive lesson plans, brush up on my grammar to answer some questions and research songs suitable for Italain children to sing that teaches them English, but I have a place!

I'm so excited I can barely handle it. Obviously how long I get to stay out there depends on how well I do with the teaching and how many students apply for the camps, but hopefully I'll be there from the middle of June for about eight or ten weeks, with one or two weeks off for travelling. Pretty cool, right?

San Remo, where the training course for teaching at the camps is held.

"And for the first time, I can call this home"

I took a trip to Bolton Abbey yesterday with my folks. It was beautiful and wonderful and so, so warm. I am loving this weather! We went on this long walk down both sides of the river and I melted. The last mile or so was more like an endurance test for me (I used to be really fit and won athletics competitions and all sorts of things, but I'm skinny-fat now, and completely lazy) but it was a grand day nonetheless.
In hindsight, double denim was a bad choice. It was cold when we set off...

M.I.A

I wish I could say that my recent absence has been because my life is so filled with fun and exciting activities that I simply haven't had time to blog, but I would be lying. Literally my entire life at the moment revolves around these two things:

The Maine.
You know when you start listening to a band and from the very first line in the very first song you can tell that they are going to entirely consume your life? Yes. Well. It happened with me and The Maine, which is ridiculous because their audience is primarly 15 year old girls who wear fluorescent coloured hoodies and poorly applied eyeliner, but, you know, you can't fight the calling of music. Also, I'm fairly certain that the singer, John O'Callaghan, is my soul mate. Just a feeling.

My dissertation.
What an absolute joke this is turning out to be. I JUST CANNOT DO IT. My brain won't form sentences. I read pages and pages of research but I cannot retain any of it. I'm starting to panic a little bit now.

But I am still alive! And hopefully, hopefully, I will have some exciting news soon about summer, but I don't want to jinx it by mentioning just yet. Fingers crossed.

I hope everyone has a lovely easter. I gave up chocolate for lent so I'm pretty psyched about that being over on Sunday. As soon as I get this 10,000 word long essay done I'll be able to catch up on everyone's blogs again, but until then and until I can be bothered to write something again, adieu!

Five Bottles of Shampoo

She pushed in before me, in the supermarket queue
pretended not to see me, in that way women do.
She put on the counter some bread and milk too
and then she pulled out five different bottles of shampoo.
And I thought to myself, 'I will never understand women.'
And I hear some of you saying, 'Yeah but all men are all the same!
They all think they're so cool and are ruled by their dicks.'
That might be true of me, but it ain't true of all of us
so don't point that finger so quick.

I do see some of the blokes though,
In the clubs, pinching girls arses, trying to be intimidating
Making obscene passes. Man, she's a goddess, you can tell by the way she dances.
But you call her a slag when she don't accept your advances.
You just show you got no respect for yourself, show you ain't got the balls
to just talk to a girl.
So when she chats to me, you spit at her and shout 'Whore!'
Well it is written, in the art of war, to fight only the battles you can win.
But I will defend your honour til they kick my face in.
If you have to scrape me broken boned, bruised, bloodied, and battered up off the floor..
Well FUCK IT. Integrity is what black eyes were invented for.

So down with the dick-tatorship, that is so cock-sure,
they use rape as a weapon of war.
FUCK the man who thinks it's ok to give his wife a punch,
FUCK the judge who says it weren't rape cause she was drunk.
And if you're pro-life. I mean if you're PRO .. LIFE,
then become a doctor, or foster a kid.
Make it possible for people who are alive to live.
But don't you dare tell women what they can and can't do,
when it was a woman that gave life to you.

Yes, I'm a man, a fairly stereotypical one,
but I ain't afraid to say I think all women are beautiful and strong.
Too fat, too thin, that's just media spin,
you look best when you're comfortable in your own skin.
So I'm sorry, if we've made you feel undue,
the truth be known...I'm in awe of you.
You're a giver of life and warrior too.
So do you really need FIVE bottles of shampoo


-The King Blues




I went to see The King Blues last night (I'll post photos when I get home) and it was EPIC. Itch came out on his own near the end and read out this poem - it was one of the most powerful things I have ever experienced. What a hero.